New Tax to come into effect January ist 2110

nurseawful



Joined: 06/02/2009
Posts: 5934

Message Posted:
21/06/2009 09:55

The only thing that the goverment has not taxed yet is the male Appendage

This is due to the fact that

60% of the time it is hanging around unemployed

10% of the time it is hard up

20% of the time it is P......e off and

1% of the time is engaged elsewhere.



On top of that it has two dependants and they are both nuts!



However from the 1st January 2110 the male appendage will be taxed according to size.

the brackets are as follows

10" - 12" Luxury tax 1000tl

8" - 10" Pol tax 800tl

5" - 8" Privilege tax 600tl

3" - 5" nuisance tax 10,000tl



Males exceeding 12" must file Capital Gains

Anyone under 3" is eligable for a tax refund



PLEASE DO NOT ASK FOR AN EXTENSION

Lilli



Joined: 21/07/2008
Posts: 13081

Message Posted:
21/06/2009 10:05

nurse you are soooo awful. good one though xxx

nurseawful



Joined: 06/02/2009
Posts: 5934

Message Posted:
21/06/2009 11:50

Must admit thought that some of you would have been on telling us what tax bracket you will be coming under!!!!

jimmy


Joined: 15/09/2008
Posts: 251

Message Posted:
21/06/2009 12:31

how much was George refunded ? lol

Brinsley


Joined: 04/04/2009
Posts: 6858

Message Posted:
21/06/2009 12:33

Are you rising to occasion in the frustration of not been pointed in the right direction in the TRNC?



Richard

TimothyCadman


Joined: 13/12/2007
Posts: 1040

Message Posted:
21/06/2009 14:41

Makes a change that I'll get a tax refund, yippee! Only ever paid out before!

sporty


Joined: 06/12/2007
Posts: 685

Message Posted:
21/06/2009 15:00

i suspect most would be complaining of excessive capital gains when they really require a refund! lol

sporty


Joined: 06/12/2007
Posts: 685

Message Posted:
21/06/2009 15:01

nurse you've obviously gone to great lengths for this post! x

No1Doyen


Joined: 04/07/2008
Posts: 16617

Message Posted:
21/06/2009 15:03

Why worry, it's over a hundred tears before it happens - most of us willbe long gone. ))

sporty


Joined: 06/12/2007
Posts: 685

Message Posted:
21/06/2009 15:07

i wonder whether Dixie Normus will file for bankruptcy?

CyprusChill


Joined: 08/05/2009
Posts: 666

Message Posted:
21/06/2009 15:26

On the bright side -



Tax Credit potential for loss of earnings.



Further Rebate for challenging working conditions, extreme circumstances.



And a final whats mine is mine ruling.

MimoMar


Joined: 26/01/2009
Posts: 150

Message Posted:
21/06/2009 17:02

Will you pay less if you have a slack period?



Are any rebates available during the winter months to allow for depreciation/natural shrinkage?



Can you re-claim any out of pocket expenses such as willy warmers?



Will there be any regular audits/inspections to look forward to?



In the current financial climate, competition is stiff and there are hard times ahead.



My wife wants to know whether there will be any married couple allowances, whether there is any flexibilty in the system or, has she just got to swallow it?

jimmy


Joined: 15/09/2008
Posts: 251

Message Posted:
21/06/2009 17:09

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YIqttbRlJUQ

No1Doyen


Joined: 04/07/2008
Posts: 16617

Message Posted:
21/06/2009 18:32

What about if you withdraw? )

Brinsley


Joined: 04/04/2009
Posts: 6858

Message Posted:
21/06/2009 22:05

I always withdraw, I'm reliable like that!



Richard