Did our parents bring us up correctly?

No1Doyen


Joined: 04/07/2008
Posts: 16617

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 21:27

Little Red Riding Hood didn't listen to her mother. Pinocchio was a liar. Robin Hood was a thief. Tarzan wore no clothes and Snow White lived with 7 men. These are the stories our parents raised us on, and they complain about our generation being messed up! )

jock1



Joined: 06/01/2008
Posts: 3786

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 21:29

you lucky so n so ...you had parents i was an orphan.

No1Doyen


Joined: 04/07/2008
Posts: 16617

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 21:31

Sorry to hear that Jock. I'll tell you the story about Snow White when I see you. )

clayton


Joined: 30/11/2008
Posts: 1143

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 21:39

what about goldilocks.now she was something ,slept with 3 bears

proger1



Joined: 18/04/2009
Posts: 2919

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 21:42

Lets not get into Bill and Ben the alcoholics and the sunflower junkie or that Captain Pugwash and Master Bates palaver

Jeannie


Joined: 04/08/2009
Posts: 3283

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 21:42

Little Bo Peep had something dodgy going on with her sheep.

No1Doyen


Joined: 04/07/2008
Posts: 16617

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 21:44

What about Jack climbing up the Beanstalk! I wonder what he was on )

Jeannie


Joined: 04/08/2009
Posts: 3283

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 21:45

I don't think the 3 little pigs were Kosher, either

No1Doyen


Joined: 04/07/2008
Posts: 16617

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 21:48

And we all know what Jack got up to with Jill. )

jock1



Joined: 06/01/2008
Posts: 3786

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 21:54

i dont think Humpty dumpty was all that cracked up to be.

Woodspeckie


Joined: 25/01/2009
Posts: 2263

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 21:55

Wee willy winky running through the town in his nightgown, what had he been up to.

jock1



Joined: 06/01/2008
Posts: 3786

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 21:58

cows jumping over the moon ??? talking spoons....weird Acid man !!

newlad



Joined: 02/03/2008
Posts: 7819

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 22:01

Mice that cant see chopping things off with their carving knives.Some bed time stories they where,

Paul.

proger1



Joined: 18/04/2009
Posts: 2919

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 22:01

And why is it that I can remember, Hugh, Pugh, Barney Magrew, Cuthburt, Dibble and Grub but I don't remember my Maths teachers name.

No1Doyen


Joined: 04/07/2008
Posts: 16617

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 22:03

"Goosey, goosey gander, where do you wander? Yes, we know where he wandered! )

jamestalbot


Joined: 20/12/2009
Posts: 958

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 22:04

What about Muffin the mule?

Lemtich



Joined: 15/02/2007
Posts: 1487

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 22:08

I came from a long line of bachelors..........

No1Doyen


Joined: 04/07/2008
Posts: 16617

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 22:10

There Was an Old Lady Who Swallowed a Fly!

magicart


Joined: 05/10/2008
Posts: 985

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 22:11

And what about father xmas-must be the biggest lie of them all?

No1Doyen


Joined: 04/07/2008
Posts: 16617

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 22:12

Ring a Ring o' Roses.

jock1



Joined: 06/01/2008
Posts: 3786

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 22:13

msg 19 you LIE !!!!!

deputydawg


Joined: 30/03/2010
Posts: 1727

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 22:13

Little Jack Horner using his thumb because never taught how to use a KFS. The Owl and the Pussy Cat being allowed to go to sea without first filing a risk analysis report with the Health and Safety Authority, and all those kids living in a shoe who should have been taken to a place of safety by the Social Services.

No1Doyen


Joined: 04/07/2008
Posts: 16617

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 22:14

) ) )

jock1



Joined: 06/01/2008
Posts: 3786

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 22:14

aaah the good old days...

proger1



Joined: 18/04/2009
Posts: 2919

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 22:17

And what about Fly away Peter, Fly away Paul. Did either of them have a flight plan?

Blackbird



Joined: 11/08/2009
Posts: 1432

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 22:18

....Captain Pugwash..with characters like Master Bates, Seaman Staines, and Roger the cabin boy. All aboard the Black Pig...

Woodspeckie


Joined: 25/01/2009
Posts: 2263

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 22:19

and Mother Hubbard having no food in the cuboard starving her dog where was the RSPCA

clayton


Joined: 30/11/2008
Posts: 1143

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 22:21

what about little red riding hood,that wolf and his 2 mates.with a huf and a puff i,ll blow that house down

proger1



Joined: 18/04/2009
Posts: 2919

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 22:22

If that was bad what about the old woman who lived in the shoe, she just fed everything to everything, that was real animal cruelty

proger1



Joined: 18/04/2009
Posts: 2919

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 22:24

clayton, what 2 mates?

newlad



Joined: 02/03/2008
Posts: 7819

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 22:26

Clayton what two mates,

Paul.

daisy dukes


Joined: 06/09/2008
Posts: 3815

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 22:27

msg 25....of course they didn't come back, CTA went bust!





DD

jock1



Joined: 06/01/2008
Posts: 3786

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 22:27

Yea man, fairies and goblins..

deputydawg


Joined: 30/03/2010
Posts: 1727

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 22:28

The pregnant fairy who sat on a toadstool. (before the 9pm watershed).

newlad



Joined: 02/03/2008
Posts: 7819

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 22:31

Anyone remember the five little monkeys,

Paul.

No1Doyen


Joined: 04/07/2008
Posts: 16617

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 22:31

Tom Tom the Pipers son....

newlad



Joined: 02/03/2008
Posts: 7819

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 22:32

Why would the little boy down the lane want some wool,

Paul.

proger1



Joined: 18/04/2009
Posts: 2919

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 22:35

And was Noddy the original boy racer ??

No1Doyen


Joined: 04/07/2008
Posts: 16617

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 22:36

Do you know why Big Ears had big ears?

Jeannie


Joined: 04/08/2009
Posts: 3283

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 22:36

Bill- why did he steal that pig?



Another dodgy git

proger1



Joined: 18/04/2009
Posts: 2919

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 22:37

And my all time favourite:



Where's that Lubby Loo ??

Jeannie


Joined: 04/08/2009
Posts: 3283

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 22:38

What about the pyromaniac spotted insects - what was that all about?

jock1



Joined: 06/01/2008
Posts: 3786

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 22:39

Where's all the gollywogs gone ?

proger1



Joined: 18/04/2009
Posts: 2919

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 22:40

jock1, you'll have the racist police after you, wasn't that somewhere on Camberwick Green

jock1



Joined: 06/01/2008
Posts: 3786

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 22:43

proger, no idea.

Jeannie


Joined: 04/08/2009
Posts: 3283

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 22:43

Paul - weren't they on the jam jars - I had a badge, I'll have you know

No1Doyen


Joined: 04/07/2008
Posts: 16617

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 22:44

Noddy is on his way to see his best friend Big-Ears.  He puts on his special blue shorts, red hat and red jacket to match his little red shoes - and leaves his house.He meets the Postman.He says excitedly: "Hi, Posties, I'm off to see my best friend Big-Ears."He meets the Milkman.

 "Hi, Milko, I'm off to see my best friend Big-Ears."

 He sees a delivery man.

 "Hi, Van Man, I'm off to see my best friend Big-Ears."

 He sees his neighbour, riding a cycle.

 "Hi, Cyclies, I'm off to see my best friend Big-Ears."

 He arrives at Big-Ears gate and cannot wait to surprise his friend.

 Noddy knocks on the door and Big-Ears opens it and says:

  "Not you again!  P**S OFF!"

jock1



Joined: 06/01/2008
Posts: 3786

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 23:01

No1, tell us the one you got six months for.

No1Doyen


Joined: 04/07/2008
Posts: 16617

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 23:06

Jock. I'd have to ban myself if I told that one. )

PaulW



Joined: 20/07/2009
Posts: 651

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 23:07

Go on Bill tell us..........

deputydawg


Joined: 30/03/2010
Posts: 1727

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 23:16

Taffy was a Welshman, Taffy was a thief, Taffy came to our house, and stole a leg of beef. (thats what could happen in those days when the raw meat was not on a separate shelf to the cooked meat and marked with a "use by date", labelled with country of origin, soaked in colourings and preservatives, and full of steroids). Taffy should have stuck with lamb as he knew that 3 or more sheep tethered to a post in Wales represented a Welsh Leisure Centre.

newlad



Joined: 02/03/2008
Posts: 7819

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 23:18

Clayton,

What two mates,

Paul.

jock1



Joined: 06/01/2008
Posts: 3786

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 23:38

Snow white was walking through the woods and she spotted Pinocchio, she ran up to him, threw him on his back sat on his face and said " lie to me Lie to me"

No1Doyen


Joined: 04/07/2008
Posts: 16617

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 23:39

Paul I'll tell but promise not to tell Jean. )

Lilli



Joined: 21/07/2008
Posts: 13081

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 23:48

what about little jack horner, poor kid had to sit in a corner, where were social services then x god no wonder we are all screwed up, all those poor little souls so mistreated

No1Doyen


Joined: 04/07/2008
Posts: 16617

Message Posted:
24/08/2010 23:55

..........and the dish ran away with the spoon! What's all that about? )

apc2010


Joined: 28/07/2010
Posts: 1689

Message Posted:
25/08/2010 01:39

sorry to ruin a few child hoods , the caaptain pugwash characters are urban myths and never appeared...



http://www.snopes.com/radiotv/tv/pugwash.asp

PaulW



Joined: 20/07/2009
Posts: 651

Message Posted:
25/08/2010 02:08

Gawd - there's always one.................;0;0;0

PaulW



Joined: 20/07/2009
Posts: 651

Message Posted:
25/08/2010 02:11

Sorry - correction to message 58 - should read

nurseawful



Joined: 06/02/2009
Posts: 5934

Message Posted:
25/08/2010 06:41

Mary had a little lamb......................bet the midwife passed out!



Chris

hattikins


Joined: 17/02/2008
Posts: 2793

Message Posted:
25/08/2010 17:54

Bill and Ben, floballob, flower pot men, and their friend *weed *up the corner, what is that all about.

clayton


Joined: 30/11/2008
Posts: 1143

Message Posted:
25/08/2010 19:05

prodger1,paul,what 2 mates.the huf and the puff

newlad



Joined: 02/03/2008
Posts: 7819

Message Posted:
25/08/2010 19:47

Clayton,

Mess 28.

proger1



Joined: 18/04/2009
Posts: 2919

Message Posted:
25/08/2010 20:20

Ahhh that makes much more sense now then, thanks Clayton